Thanks to an Inexplicable service outage in the middle of the work day I had to dust off the Dinosaur and Post up my response to BnB’s questions for the fellas
1.When a man is no longer interested in a woman, why can’t he be responsible enough to let that woman know he is no longer feeling her rather than pulling “disappearing acts” (i.e. stop the calling, texting, emailing) and hoping she figures it out on her own?
Firstly, are we SURE women didn’t invent this? Okay, that’s projecting, let me stop.
The reality is that ultimately, we run out of stuff to say.
Being particularly sensitive to rejection, I tend to just stop communicating rather than issuing some sort of Dear Jane call/text/email/carrier pigeon.
The “Fade to black” is a common tactic employed by men AND women.
When you think about it, its pretty cut and dry. It says:
“I do not have anything else to say. If I did, I would be contacting you.”
Is it possible they have been somehow inhibited from commucation? Sure. Its POSSIBLE. But I would then refer you to my favorite Razor
Occam’s razor (or Ockham’s razor), is the meta-theoretical principle that “entities must not be multiplied beyond necessity” (entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem) and the conclusion thereof, that the simplest solution is usually the correct one.
Bear in mind, the alternative is someone calling you who doesn’t REALLY have anything to say. Who wants that?
2. What does a man mean when he says “He’s not ready for a relationship right now” or “I’m not ready to be serious”?
It means moderate your expectations. It means YES he wants to have sex, but NO he doesn’t wish to explore the complexities of a relationship. Reading more into that conversation is pointless.
3. Why do mean lie about stupid stuff? Why is everything a fact-finding expedition? Why do I have to dig it out of them like I’m mining for gold?
Truths hurts. Some truths are avoided because we don’t wanna hurt YOU. Some because we don’t wanna hurt ourselves. Mostly the latter.
Many times the art of telling the truth revolves around being who we WISH we were and being who we are.
4. Why won’t a man just tell you what their thoughts are feelings are about your relationship?
Expressing emotionalism is the most vulnerable form of communication. When boys are raised to express emotionalism they will be equipped to express that to their prospective spouses.
Are you preparing the young men in your life to do that? Surely you don’t think its going to come naturally…
5. Why even start a sentence with “Baby, just let me explain…”
What are we supposed to say?
“Hey…you know how that is. ” *kanyeshrug* “What’s for dinner?”