I am a depression survivor.
I witnessed an extraordinary moment on Okayplayer today and thought that i would share with you…what I shared with them.
I sat in the bed as the clock struck 2002 with my 9 day old son in my arms and laboring under the clear realization that either my marriage was going to have to end or someone (probably me) would end up getting physically hurt or (my sons, 3 and 9 days) mentally scarred.
Sure enough…by President’s Day I was driving to the Red Roof Inn around the corner from what used to be my apartment.
By my birthday in June I had moved my soon to be ex and sons into a luxury apartment I barely could have afforded if we were still together.
By July Fourth after a brief vacation with a good friend, I came home and logged onto the internet..and never logged off.
I stopped sleeping at night
I stopped socializing with anyone other than the occasional visits with my sons
My work attendance was spotty except on the weekends when i waited tables for cash while 80% of my check was still deposited in my joint account with the ex.
By Labor Day I had contracted Scarlet Fever (think a potentially fatal version of Strep Throat that is almost unheard of in civilized society)
By Columbus Day I was unemployed.
By Thanksgiving I was staring homelessness in the face
By Christmas I was in My mother’s Basement.
It took Three years for me to conquer those demons…
And they STILL lurk in my subconscious…
I needed to go through what i went through..but I didnt need to fall that far, that hard, for that long, to get where I needed to be.
We all got stories…thats the short and fairly bland version of mine.
I need to come back to this one day…But since I took the time to tell them…I couldn’t very well cheat you guys.
If enough of you ask..Ill go into more details.
If you don’t ask..you will have to wait for the book. and who knows WHEN that will come around.